Good choice of sounds in the beginning, starting with melody + rhythm and another rhythm at 00:05.
00:12 transition with a new melody is a bit sudden, suggestion: Let the rhythm continue, start the new melody awhile later as the 2 melodies are in different keys OR do a buildup with the 1st melody ie more parts, more volume (like verse transit into chorus)
Work on the ending, suggestion: one last repeat of the melody without rhythm as rhythm makes it sound as if there is a continuation. Work on more contrast (whole song sounds like 2 verses rather than verse + chorus)
Comments
tanwensiu
Good choice of sounds in the beginning, starting with melody + rhythm and another rhythm at 00:05. 00:12 transition with a new melody is a bit sudden, suggestion: Let the rhythm continue, start the new melody awhile later as the 2 melodies are in different keys OR do a buildup with the 1st melody ie more parts, more volume (like verse transit into chorus) Work on the ending, suggestion: one last repeat of the melody without rhythm as rhythm makes it sound as if there is a continuation. Work on more contrast (whole song sounds like 2 verses rather than verse + chorus)